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Businessman Traveler

You've Been in Europe Too Long When...

  • It occurs to you that the sidewalk cafe is the pinnacle of civilization. You spend half a day there, and it doesn't strike you as a waste of time.
  • Even though you own a dozen pair of sunglasses, the ones you brought with you just don't cut it. You buy a pair of wraparounds that are perfect.... and will make you look like a pimp if you wear them at home.
  • You decide that Americans really are too uptight about secondhand smoke. A good looking woman rides by on a bicycle with a cigarette in one hand and you barely look up.
  • You put down your coffee cup so you can talk with both hands.
  • Tourists blocking the sidewalk while they look at a map upside-down don't seem obnoxious. Nor do their outfits -- sandals with brown socks, orange cargo shorts, and lime green safari shirts.
  • Your brand new mobile phone seems hopelessly outdated because it only has 12 buttons, and all it can do is make phone calls.
  • You think maybe $450 for one of those slim leather briefcases would be a reasonable investment in your personal expression of style.
  • You can't imagine what Americans see in baseball caps -- or bicycle helmets, for that matter.
  • You transpose prepositions as though English were your second language, and you don't even care.
  • Dinner at 11:00 p.m., and coffee after, no longer gives you indigestion or keeps you awake.
  • Driving with one hand on the horn is such an advantage you can't imagine why it's not taught in driver's ed.
  • You see no contradiction in preserving historic buildings covered with automobile soot.
  • $170 a night seems about right for a hotel room with a hard bed, a lukewarm drizzle of a shower, and no washcloths. You can tell it's a non-smoking room because the ashtray is clean.
  • You lose track of time calling home at $2.00 a minute in roaming charges on your new mobile phone with only 12 buttons. You don't even know what the roaming charges are for the dial-up Internet connection you use for checking important stuff like the college football scores.

18 days, 9 different beds, 11 flights, 6 train trips, God knows how many taxis, and only one opportunity to do laundry. I arrived home last night wearing my last clean shirt! Submitted by your faithful correspondent, Dave B. of Eugene, Oregon.

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Cheers,

Annette
President & Co-founder



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